Ah. So much going on in the world right now….
Kanye’s meltdown.
Buzz about Britney’s VMA nightmare 
(I’m still in shock).
Rosie’s new book “Celebrity Detox”… and the sneak peeks floating around. 
It’s a wonder we have the will to live in the real world with all this juicy stuff happening…
And speaking of the real world…
English. Seems simple enough. But such a cryptic language. I teach it. I also spend my days in a school with approximately 1499 other people. I also live in a neighbourhood with LOTS of (fabulous) thirty and forty something women. 
I also tend to be out and about a lot. And these are some of the things I hear (that you might too) that could be construed as benign.
Alas… a warning. The translations that follow each phrase are done so SANS the rose colored glasses I normally wear.
In case you’re wondering, they’re still under renovation dust. Probably a bit of tile grout to scrub off of them now, too…
“That’s so… interesting.” Used on multiple occasions. To do with ideas, decorating, clothing, or anything, really. TRANSLATE: That’s so UGLY. That’s so GROSS. How could you possibly have DONE THAT.
“Well. Don’t you just take the cake.” Used with a little, tight smile when you’ve done something novel. TRANSLATE: What are you - some freak?!
“I’ll see if it fits my schedule.” Used daily when trying to coordinate plans. TRANSLATE: When hell freezes over.
“She’s got some good qualities…” Used when speaking about the person who pissed some other person off. TRANSLATE: Bi%ch.
“I could never pull that off…” Multitude of occasions… TRANSLATE: Nobody with half a brain looks good in that, decorates like that, or schedules in such crazy way.
“It’s up to you.” For exchanges where there might be a tiny contrast of opinions. TRANSLATE: If it were up to me, it would be the COMPLETE opposite of what you just suggested.
“You seem, like, so busy.” I hear this too much. TRANSLATE: What are you, some manic freaking nutcase?
Juicy Writer Website today? NADA. Just go write.
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